Do humans fear death first, or the unknown?
Or perhaps, do humans fear the unknown because they fear death, or do they fear death because they fear the unknown?
This kind of chicken-and-egg question could keep someone pondering all afternoon without reaching a definitive answer.
But from another perspective, aren't death and the unknown synonymous?
Death is an instinctive fear for living beings, the original "unknown." But the unknowns that humans fear are no longer limited to just death.
For humans, these contradictory creatures, they despise loneliness and a life so predictable they can foresee what's yet to happen. That's why they crave another person entering their lives, adding uncertainty, satisfying their curiosity.
But uncertainty is a form of the unknown, something humans also instinctively fear.
"For some, the fear of a stranger intruding into their lives far outweighs the fear of growing old alone. So, rather than trying to accept living with someone else, they'd rather endure decades of solitude until death. Unfortunately, I'm one of those people."
Michael sighed, feeling a wave of emotion.
The Flame-Chasers who had come to celebrate the wedding had dispersed at some point. After all, it was the briefest of ceremonies—no kneeling proposal, no lengthy, hollow vows. Just taking the other's hand, placing a ring on their finger. Everything fell into place naturally, much like their feelings.
And now, Michael held Elysia's left hand, his fingers constantly caressing the ring on her ring finger, an indescribable multitude of feelings surging within him.
"Eh? Then how did you end up in my hands then?"
Elysia squeezed his hand back, waggling her fingers playfully as if declaring her ownership.
"Perhaps because... I met you right at the very beginning, when I first came to this world. To me, you were never a stranger who barged in halfway. For me, only a life with you feels complete, feels certain."
Elysia pursed her lips, savoring the sentiment in his words, her own heart filled with mixed emotions.
"For me... I suppose it's the same?"
She murmured softly, then hesitant thoughts began to flood her mind.
"But, what if things were different... Michael, what if we hadn't met at the very beginning? What if we met later, like Kevin and Mei, when we were already getting used to being alone? Could we still have reached this point?"
"Of course!"
Michael nodded without hesitation.
"Hypotheticals are usually boring, but I imagine if our story unfolded differently, it would go something like this—
"Even though I was used to solitude, even though I was terrified of someone else barging into my unchanging life and leading my existence into the unknown... If it were you, I could overcome that fear. Because from the day I met you, I could no longer bear being alone."
"Pfft! You say that so seriously!"
Elysia giggled, covering her mouth, then threw herself into Michael's arms, quickly wrapping her arms around his neck.
"It's like... you've really experienced it."
Michael smiled faintly.
Yes, just like I've really experienced it.
"So, what now?"
"Hm?"
The lights in the room instantly dimmed, and the window that had been letting in a steady breeze gently closed.
Elysia's eyes, sparkling with mischief, were clearly visible even in the darkness—
"I mean, now, and next, what should we do?"
Michael's body instantly stiffened.
People don't grow uniformly. They often progress quickly in one area, making others mistakenly believe they've truly matured.
But in some aspects, some viewpoints remain frighteningly naive.
Although Michael had recently refuted similar ideas to Kevin, calling them escapism.
When it came to himself, perhaps he couldn't escape convention either?
Elysia blinked repeatedly, the faint light from outside reflecting in her eyes, making them glitter.
In contrast, Michael's gaze and features were lost in the darkness, his body growing colder, gradually losing warmth.
The distance between them was practically zero, yet it felt as if they could be pulled infinitely far apart in the next moment.
How much time passed like this?
It felt like ten minutes, maybe half an hour, or perhaps... just an instant?
"Ah!"
Elysia couldn't help but let out a small cry as Michael suddenly swept her up into his arms without warning. His lips twitched, his expression turning somewhat playful.
He leaned down, whispering close to her ear:
"Elysia..."
"What is it!"
Elysia's arms remained tightly around his neck until his next words came:
"You've gained weight!"
......
The wind tonight is a bit restless. Perhaps the underground city's ventilation system is working too well; the window keeps rattling occasionally, making it hard to sleep…
Hmm, no, that's not right. Michael couldn't sleep at all.
It wasn't just because of his body's abnormality, nor just because of the excitement of the past few hours…
It was also because of the future he was striving to secure.
"Sigh…"
He stared silently at the dark ceiling. The ceiling remained silent, offering no answers. Of course, Michael didn't need any answers either.
As the planned time drew nearer, he thought he might start feeling afraid—afraid his upcoming actions would fail, afraid he would lose everything he had finally obtained, including Elysia, who was currently pretending to sleep while holding his arm.
But the truth was, his mind was clear, devoid of fear or worry. He had never felt so resolute, so certain that what he was about to do was absolutely right, and absolutely necessary.
He knew it was time to make his move.
But there was one more thing to do.
He had to... give Elysia a proper farewell.
Not only because he should, not only because he wanted to, but also because he had to confess to Elysia at this moment—
Because the place he needed to go was somewhere he couldn't reach by his own power. He needed Elysia to take him on the final leg of the journey.
"Ely..."
He had just begun to speak when a slightly cool hand covered his mouth.
Then, the hand moved past his cheek, rested on his shoulder, and gently turned his body so they were facing each other, embracing.
The summer nights here weren't stuffy; in fact, they were almost too cool, cool enough that they could both feel the goosebumps on each other's skin.
Michael's fingers began to trace patterns on Elysia's back, as if trying to smooth away the raised skin.
But it was merely a way to mask the momentary panic in his heart.
"Michael, promise me you won't say goodbye, okay?"
Michael pulled her closer, pressing his forehead against hers.
Now that things were out in the open, Michael's mind strangely calmed down again.
Yes, he had always known what Elysia wanted to do, and of course, Elysia had always known what he wanted to do. This tacit understanding between them couldn't be masked by veiled words.
"Ely, I'm more..."
"Shh!"
Before he could elaborate on his "self-righteous" reasons, Elysia kissed him without hesitation. And so, no matter how many words Michael wanted to say, he had to put them aside for now. He closed his eyes, boldly returning her kiss.
The whistling wind outside grew wilder, but the rattling of the windowpane had ceased sometime ago.
The wind caressed their bodies, the chill deepening, even causing the clothes they wore to billow and flap noisily.
Wait!
Clothes?
Michael turned, finally feeling the almost imperceptible dizziness. His center of gravity had shifted; they were no longer lying down but standing face-to-face—before he could speak, Elysia had brought him to the place closest to Finality.
Looking down, he was wearing dirty, ill-fitting clothes that looked vaguely familiar. Looking at Elysia in front of him, she was also small, draped in a black cloak pilfered from the orphanage.
"This place is..."
Michael looked around. It was an utterly empty platform, floating steadily above the clouds. Amidst the cloud peaks, shattered ruins were faintly visible.
Of course, setting aside the peculiar background, the structure itself looked quite familiar.
"This is the Vostok train station, isn't it?"
The structure was largely the same, though now there was an incongruous sign hanging overhead—
"Origin → Finality"
"Elysia, signs like that are for subways."
"Ah! Ah... really? Well, I'll fix it next time, definitely!"
Their bodies had somehow reverted to the size they were when they first left Vostok, and perhaps even their personalities had become a little more childish. Elysia raised her wrist, pulling Michael along as they hopped around for a bit before finally sitting on a platform bench.
"Remember, Michael? That was the first time we ever rode a train."
"Yeah, we didn't have money for tickets back then, had to sneak on using all sorts of tricks."
Elysia chuckled, but her expression instantly turned melancholic, looking rather out of place on her youthful features.
"Back then, it was our first parting. Deep down, we already had a feeling—that maybe, once we left, we'd never return to the orphanage, never see Mother Cocolia and everyone else again."
"And on the platform, we saw so many people coming and going, seeing others off. People seem to particularly like parting on platforms. No, perhaps it's just that the platform is the furthest they can accompany someone."
"So platforms are places for parting—that's what I thought back then. But unfortunately, no one said goodbye to us."
"Is that... why you made this place look like a platform?"
"Mhm. Ever since then, I've thought, if I ever have to experience parting again, I must properly say 'goodbye' to them on a platform. Because a parting without a goodbye... is just too impolite, you know!"
"Elysia..."
Michael took a deep breath. His voice sounded a bit childish, so he had to lower it to sound solemn, to show his resolve was firm:
"This time, let me go."
Elysia didn't interrupt this time, just silently held his hand.
So Michael continued, rattling off his reasons:
"Elysia, what you can do is sacrifice your own life to sever the so-called threads of fate, right?"
Elysia's gaze flickered slightly, and she shook her head noncommittally, but Michael, lost in his own explanation, didn't notice.
"But you should know, even if you do that, it's hard to say if it will help the current situation. However, if I become the Herrscher of Finality, perhaps I'll have a way to seize the authority of the Twelfth Herrscher, and then you all can defeat me..."
(Note Michael's transmigration.)
"Is that your plan? Always so straightforward... But, Michael, why are you so sure you can become Finality?"
Michael paused, taken aback. Elysia wasn't arguing, leaving his prepared counterarguments useless.
After a moment's thought, he replied:
"Actually, it's a feeling I've had for a long time. When I first constructed the Second Herrscher Core, I found it strange. Because what I constructed wasn't just the dead core, but an improvement upon it, optimizing its internal structure into something I could use myself."
"That shouldn't have been something I could do back then. Even constructing a dead core is no less difficult than reconstructing a body. And before my first metamorphosis, I wasn't confident I could reconstruct my body, yet I managed something even harder with little effort..."
"Later, I entered the Imaginary Space twice during battles, plus the time with Vishnu, making it three times in total. Each time, I felt a presence within the Imaginary Space peering at me, both cautiously and undisguisedly... and calling to me."
"And the moment I confirmed that I wasn't replicating the Herrscher Cores themselves, but the authorities of the other Herrschers, I had an epiphany—Ely, did I ever tell you? Actually, I'm not from this world. That's precisely why I was able to escape Finality's grasp, but perhaps, because of that, Finality has also targeted me."
"It bestowed the authorities of the other Herrschers upon me. And when all twelve authorities are gathered, perhaps, I will become Finality—though I say perhaps, I'm quite certain that's the case. I can no longer eat or sleep, Elysia. I'm... not human anymore."
Hearing his last words, Elysia's eyebrows quirked again, a smile of unclear meaning appearing.
"Have you considered that if this is all Finality's calculation, your current actions are tantamount to walking right into a trap?"
"Of course, I understand that. But if I'm destined to become Finality whether I act or not, why not take the initiative and seize the chance?"
Hearing this, Elysia's eyes flickered again. She seemed about to speak, but ultimately remained silent, letting Michael finish.
"If I fail to seize the Twelfth Herrscher's authority, or if I lose my personality after becoming Finality, well, that's just the worst-case scenario. Of course, if I realize things have reached that point, I will try my best to cut the threads of fate, to create possibilities for you in the next era..."
At this point, Michael suddenly gripped Elysia's hand tightly, turned his head, and looked directly into her eyes:
"Whether I succeed or not, I will try to erase fate before Finality descends. Aponia should be able to tell if the threads of fate exist. Ely, promise me, only if I fail completely, utterly, will you choose to sacrifice yourself, okay?"
Elysia avoided Michael's gaze, sighed softly, and then chuckled lightly again.
Except... her words were completely off-topic:
"Michael, I went to see Mobius earlier. She said some things to me, asked me some questions—Michael, do you think... humans are necessarily afraid of death?"
"Yes, the survival instinct. That's an instinct that humans, or rather all living beings, cannot escape."
"Then Michael, are you... afraid right now?"
"Ngh!"
Michael touched his head.
It seemed... from the moment he started planning this until now, he had never once hesitated out of fear of death.
Perhaps... his fear of Elysia disappearing far outweighed his fear of his own death.
"What about me then... Michael..."
Elysia suddenly began to tremble violently, tears instantly welling up in her eyes.
"You should understand too, right? I'm different from you. I was born a Herrscher... I was never human."
Michael bit his lip and nodded, surprisingly:
"Yes, Ely."
And she cried even harder.
"Elysia, you encompass almost all the beauty in the world, so beautiful it's hard to believe you're real. I once saw you as a 'god.' I always believed you had transcended humanity, become a god beyond all existence. How could a god possess an emotion like fear?"
Michael took Elysia's hands, guiding them to rest over her own heart:
"But Ely, feel your own heartbeat, look at your own tears. Are you truly not afraid?"
Transcending humanity to become a fearless god – that's wrong.
What makes humans human is possessing both light and shadow.
The same desire, reflected in a person, could become universally despised greed, or it could become the driving force pushing someone forward.
This potential is where humanity shines brighter than so-called "divinity," and it's what truly captivates Elysia.
And divinity seems more like a fantasy gathering all "light"—an existence with only positive aspects, devoid of any flaws, is called a god.
But, if flaws didn't exist, what meaning would beauty have?
Just as, without shadows, how could people realize there is light in the world?
And life is a constant struggle, wavering between the light and dark sides, trying to find the meaning of one's own existence.
Therefore…
"Therefore, Ely, you are indeed afraid right now. You're afraid that the meaning you fought so hard to find—[the desire to become human, the desire to protect humanity]—will be shattered."
"Whether you fear death or not is less important. Ely, I once said that for everyone, there are always some [few] things more important than [everything]. Similarly, for a person, there are always some [meanings] more important than [life and death]. You fear something far more terrifying than death."
"Besides, the so-called survival instinct, the so-called fear, doesn't represent the entirety of human duality. You occasionally tease people, you jealously stand on tiptoe to compare heights, you get gloomy because you can't break the bad habit of biting your nails... In my eyes, these things symbolize humanity far more than fear does."
"Then... then... Michael, in your eyes, did I finally become human..."
"Of course. You have always been human, from start to finish."
Michael tenderly brushed a strand of hair from her temple. In a daze, they both returned to their adult forms.
As if remembering something, Michael pulled a Celtic knot-style brooch from his pocket.
"I was too embarrassed to pin it on you back then, let me do it now."
Elysia instantly broke into a smile through her tears.
Michael carefully pinned it to Elysia's chest. His fingers inevitably brushed against places they shouldn't, but neither of them had any romantic thoughts at that moment.
"Elysia, you were human, and you will continue to be human..."
Michael paused, then suddenly reached out and poked Elysia's cheek:
"But from now on, try to live with a little more ease—just like before."
After saying this, he prepared to activate the Authority of the Void, but his head suddenly went BANG. Something detonated within him, instantly flowing through his body like powder, immobilizing him.
"Sorry, this might not be the ending you wanted."
Michael's pupils constricted to pinpricks. Elysia wiped away her tears, a victorious smile on her face, and poked Michael's cheek—
"Sorry, Michael. But no matter what, from now on, even if I'm not here, you must live well on your own. And if you can live with a little more ease, that would be even better."
Then, she turned without looking back and walked towards the edge of the platform. The whistle that had been silent finally sounded, belatedly, as a Train quickly pulled into the station, stopping right in front of her.
"Platforms are for farewells, but I don't want to say goodbye, Michael. Because I have this foolish hope too—if we don't say goodbye, does that mean we were never really apart?"
The Train doors slid open. Elysia's tears dripped onto the ground, forming a dark pool. She finished speaking through choked sobs, unable to resist looking back at Michael one last time, then lifted her foot to step into the empty carriage... and missed her step.
"What!"
A slight feeling of weightlessness, accompanied by dizziness. Elysia clutched her head and shook it hard, finally realizing something was wrong—why was she still sitting?
She looked up incredulously. The Train doors were open, and Michael stood facing her at the entrance.
"The Authority of Sentience... When!"
Even with the Authority of Sentience, if she had been prepared, she could have resisted with her crystals, but...
"Silly girl. It started the moment I picked you up."
Michael wore a blissful smile as he took a step back into the empty carriage.
"Wait, get back here!"
Elysia lunged forward violently, but the doors closed perfectly in time. She slammed her fists against them, but they didn't budge. She rammed her head against them, but the doors didn't even tremble.
Finally, she could only lean against the thin door, weeping as she faced Michael, who maintained his smile.
"Don't make that face, Ely. Tears don't suit you."
Michael said with a smile.
"Like you said, we won't say goodbye, because we will definitely meet again—I'll be waiting for you, Elysia."
The whistle blew again, and the Train began to move slowly forward.
Elysia seemed to remember something. She started desperately pounding on the door again, shouting something.
But Michael simply leaned lightly against a handrail inside the carriage, his head bowed, smiling silently.