Jay-jay's POV
"…how many months again?" I asked the person on the other line.
["Seven months. Please, Jay, just say yes. It won't be today, maybe next week."]
I winced. I wanted to say no, but it felt rude. Besides, I don't think Grace has any other friends. Probably because—well, she got pregnant early and, to top it off, she's kind of mean.
"Why don't you go with her instead?"
["She said she's tired of going out with me. Apparently, I'm too impatient."]
"Whatever. Fine. Just tell me when so I can ask for permission early."
["Thank you, Jay! Grace is going to be so happy."]
She said goodbye before ending the call. I sighed deeply.
Seven months already? It felt like it was just recently when we found out she was pregnant. Which means… her belly was already showing back when they were still fighting.
She told me yesterday that her pregnancy's been pretty sensitive. She can barely move properly, always lying down or sitting to rest. The doctor just recently cleared her to go outside again.
And guess what?
They said they wanted to name the baby "Jay" after me. If it's a girl, she'll be as pretty as I am. But if it's a boy—dear God, please no! I hope he doesn't turn out like an Ulupong. That would be a massive headache.
I turned toward the door when I heard a knock, followed by it opening. It was Kuya Angelo, dressed up and looking sharp.
"Ready?" he asked.
I nodded and slipped my phone into my pocket. He walked out ahead of me and I followed. By the time we got to the living room, everyone was there—Tita Gema, Tito Julz, Aries, Kuya Angelo, and me.
"Are we eating after church?" I asked, and heard soft chuckles from Tito Julz and Tita Gema.
"You're already thinking about food when we haven't even left," Aries said, pulling me by the arm.
From the house to the white van, he didn't let go of my arm. I glanced around inside the vehicle.
Just making sure we're not riding with some organ-harvesting group without me knowing.
Aries looks like someone who steals organs.
Tita Gema climbed into the passenger seat. Tito Julz was the one driving, and Kuya sat beside me. The feeling was weird. It reminded me of that New Year's Eve when they suddenly announced the engagement.
I suddenly felt nervous. There better not be another surprise today.
I looked at Kuya Angelo and then at Aries. They looked like cops guarding a criminal trying to escape.
I may be a burnt rice crust snatcher, but I'm not a criminal.
I ignored them and pulled out my phone to play a game. I just kept tapping without even looking out the window. Traffic was light since it was Sunday, so I knew the trip wouldn't take long.
I was right. I hadn't even reached the second level of the game when the van came to a stop. Tito and Tita got out first, then Kuya followed. I was about to step down too—until I froze.
This isn't a church.
Since when did a hospital become a church?
I looked at Kuya Angelo, who was staring at me seriously. Tita stood nearby, waiting to see if I'd get out, and Aries reached out to hold my hand.
"Why are we here? Is this the new church design?" I asked innocently, even though I already knew the answer.
"Come down, Jay," Kuya said calmly.
I shook my head. I saw Tita Gema approach him and place a hand on his shoulder.
"Let's not force her. She's not ready," she said, and Kuya turned to face her so they could talk.
"Jay, try to understand. We're doing this for you," Aries said and gently pushed me.
I quickly stopped myself from moving and gripped the seat to avoid being pushed by this annoying Zodiac sign.
"I don't want to. I know what you're planning." I resisted as his pushing got stronger.
"You're planning to send me to the mental hospital. I may joke around a lot, but I'm not crazy."
He stopped pushing.
"Idiot! Why would we send you back to your real home?"
Real home? The mental hospital is my real home?
"You lunatic! When did I ever—" I didn't get to finish. He suddenly gave me a hard shove.
I wasn't able to brace myself, so I fell straight out of the van. I landed with a thud, shocking Kuya, who was just by the door talking.
"Owwww…" I groaned weakly from the pain in my back and elbow.
"Aries! You hurt your sister!" Tita Gema scolded as she helped me up.
"Good job," I heard Kuya say to Aries.
Beast!
I held my elbow as I finally stood properly. People were staring at me, making me feel even more embarrassed. I probably looked ridiculous. I wish I had just passed out from the fall—or maybe even cracked my head open. Anything but this humiliation.
I looked down, rubbing my elbow. Tita supported me as we walked into the hospital. People were still staring like I was a walking joke.
Excuse me?! I was pushed, okay?
"Let's go to the E.R. first," said Tito Julz as he turned toward a hallway, but I immediately stopped.
"No, it's fine. I'd rather rest at home. Let's just go back." I said, taking a step back—but I felt someone's body behind me.
I looked up a little and was met by Kuya's dark expression. I quickly stepped away.
"K-Kuya, let's just go home," I pleaded.
He shook his head. "You need this."
"Kuya…" My tone was still pleading, but he just kept walking.
I knew the real reason we were here.
They wanted me to see a psychiatrist. They'd force me to talk about my dreams. Maybe even hypnotize me—like those scams I've seen on TV. Budol-budol style.
Tita approached me and put an arm around my shoulder.
"Don't be scared. This is for your own good."
We walked side by side to follow Kuya. I knew Tito Julz and my beloved brother—the one I really wanted to smack repeatedly—were right behind us. I was still clutching my elbow because of the lingering pain.
Damn you, you horoscope demon.
We stopped in front of a door. A nameplate on the side displayed the doctor's name and title. I immediately grabbed the hem of Tita's blouse.
"I don't want to, Tita."
I felt Kuya's hand grip my arm, trying to pull me closer to the door. I didn't want to start a scene, so I resisted subtly, though deep down I really wanted to throw punches.
"Kuya…"
"Angelo. Maybe we should do this another time—" Tita suggested, but Kuya immediately cut her off.
"No, Ma. We've given her enough time." he said, still pulling me toward the door.
He knocked first, and only when the person inside gave permission did he open it. A woman with short curly hair and thick-framed glasses greeted us with a smile.
"Angelo," she said warmly, walking over to meet us. "Nice to see you and your family. I thought you'd be arriving later."
I felt Kuya's grip tightening. It was starting to hurt.
"Is this her?" the woman asked.
Kuya nodded. While he looked completely at ease, I was already wincing from the pain.
She turned to me, and that's when I saw her name tag pinned near her left chest pocket: Dra. Peralta.
"You must be Jasper Jean. I'm Dr. Claudia Peralta," she said, offering her hand.
Instead of shaking it, I grabbed Kuya's arm.
"Your hand! You're hurting me!" I complained, and he let go immediately.
Even the doctor looked a bit shocked by my reaction. I scowled as I rubbed the sore part of my arm he had held onto. It's not like I was going to run, but he was gripping me like a fugitive.
"Angelo?" the doctor asked, as if questioning why he had done that.
Kuya just cleared his throat and bowed his head slightly. The doctor faced me again, smiling as she leveled with me.
"Please don't mind your brother—"
"I know. You don't have to say it."
I cut her off.
Immediately, I heard them all scolding me at once. I couldn't even understand a single word because they were all talking over each other.
They were speaking in different languages.
"It's alright. Maybe you should all have a seat first," the doctor said to us.
Suddenly, someone grabbed me and forced me to sit on the long couch beside Tita Gema. When I turned to see who it was, I was met with the scowling face of Aries.
I quickly brushed his hand away. I was still annoyed at him—especially after he pushed me out of the car. I might've forgiven him if I didn't fall, but that wasn't the case. A lot of people saw it, and I'm pretty sure it got caught on CCTV.
I'm not ready to go viral for something so stupid. People will fight over me, for sure. I'll get endorsements and become a brand ambassador. Then I'll get cast in a commercial, followed by a series or a film, and once I'm famous, Miss Jessica Soho will interview me. I'll be shouting, "i-KMJS na 'yan!"
And all that because I fell flat on my face.
Sometimes, we really need imagination to save ourselves from embarrassment. Maybe I just looked like an action star earlier and that's why people stared. My back and elbow still hurt, but my pride… that one got left outside.
Damn you, Horoscope! Damn you!
"Jay." Kuya called out, and I looked up.
"She's talking to you. Answer her." He gestured towards the doctor.
I glanced at her briefly before looking down again, fiddling with my nails. They were getting long. I seriously need an emergency nail cutter.
"Do you feel more comfortable with your family here, or would you prefer some privacy?" she asked me.
"It's fine," I replied lifelessly.
"Let's just stay. I'd like to hear what she has to say too," Kuya cut in.
"We should prioritize how she feels," the doctor replied.
Oof, attitude check—Dra. Peralta's got some.
"Whatever. Just do what you need to do," Kuya snapped.
I looked at them from under my lashes. Dra. Peralta looked bold and steady, while Kuya Angelo was shooting daggers at her. I get the feeling these two have known each other for a while.
The doctor rolled her eyes at him before grabbing her notes and facing me again. I bowed my head and continued picking at my nails.
"Would it be alright if I call you Jay-jay?"
she asked gently.
I nodded, bringing my fingernail closer to my face to examine it better.
Wut is dis?!
There was a white thing under my nail.
"Can you tell me something about yourself?" she asked again, but I ignored her.
I was too focused on the white thing under my nail. What is this? Is this gunk? But why is it white?
Dirt is usually dark, and it comes from the body. But I haven't been scratching myself. I mostly scratch my head, and this isn't what I usually get. Sometimes I find lice… or ants. If I'm lucky, a new insect.
Maybe this is what rich people's dirt looks like. High-class grime. Maybe because I've been living with Tita's family, even my gunk has gone bougie.
The real question is—
Do they taste the same as regular dirt?
Lately, I haven't been getting much dirt off my body since I've been showering more. Unlike before—back then, I could go to school without taking a bath.
Special talent.
"Jay." Kuya's voice came again, now with a hint of warning.
Does he want to taste it too?
I glanced briefly at Dra. Peralta and let out a sigh. I really didn't want to talk about my life. What would I even say to her? Who even is she?
"Jay-jay," she said softly. "I know you're uncomfortable, but you can trust me."
"What do you want to hear?" I replied.
"The things that happened to you. We need them to find a solution to your problem."
I bitterly laughed at her words. I didn't like the way she spoke. She was making me feel stupid.
"I'm an illegitimate child." I said, and I could see her slightly taken aback. "My father was already married when he met my mother. I'm the result of an affair, and I shouldn't have been born."
"Jay!" Tita Gema scolded me. "You shouldn't—"
"She wants to hear everything. That's why I said it." I continued, but Tita cut me off.
"Your mother didn't know that your father was married!" She said, her disappointment in me clear. "She only found out everything later."
I felt ashamed of myself. I thought she knew from the beginning that my father was married. Percy and I never had a proper conversation about it, so I assumed she knew.
And then, I argued with her.
"It's okay. That's a good start." The doctor said.
Honestly, I'd been irritated by her for a while now. Her tone made it sound like she could solve all my problems.
"Just say what you remember, or maybe your dream," Kuya ordered.
My dream suddenly popped into my mind. I felt uncomfortable, and my breathing became heavier. I didn't want to remember that, let alone talk about it. I didn't like how I felt.
I just want to leave here.
I shook my head. "I want to go home." I said and immediately stood up.
Aries and Tita stood up quickly. As I was about to approach the door, someone grabbed my arm tightly. When I looked at him, I saw Kuya's furious face.
"How long are you going to keep avoiding this?!" He shouted.
"Angelo. Let her go." The doctor ordered.
I tried to pull his hand off me, but he grabbed my other arm.
"Kuya, please, let her go." Aries begged.
"Jay! You need to remember!" He shouted at me.
I couldn't hold back anymore, and I broke down in tears. "I-I don't want to."
"Angelo! Don't force her—" The doctor didn't finish her sentence before Kuya spoke again.
"Jim Alcantara, Tony Dela Cruz, Alex Ramos. Don't you remember anything about them?!" He screamed at me.
My heart started racing, and my breathing became even more difficult. If I was struggling before, now it was as if I couldn't breathe at all. I grabbed my chest as my shoulders rose and fell.
"Jay!" Tita called out, pushing Kuya away from me.
"I-I can't… breathe," I said, desperately searching for something to hold onto.
Everyone started panicking, and they all tried to help me. I couldn't stop myself from freaking out. I was trying to catch my breath, but it felt like something was choking me. It was terrifying, and I couldn't stop crying.
"She's hyperventilating," the doctor said, and I felt someone hold me.
"Breathe." Kuya's voice came urgently as he helped me. "Keep breathing."
One hand was clutching my chest, and the other was holding onto Kuya's shirt. My tears blurred my vision, so I couldn't see his face clearly. I was starting to feel dizzy from the lack of proper air.
He gently laid me on a bed, and as he started to move away, I wouldn't let go of the shirt I had been holding onto.
"D-Don't…" I pleaded.
I felt the presence of several people around me, though I couldn't see who they were. I could sense them attaching some kind of device to me.
Kuya took my hand off him. "Ssshh… I'll be here. You'll be fine."
He was about to let go, but my hand chased after his. I wanted to scream at him and tell him not to leave me.
He's the one who's responsible for this.
His grip tightened on my hand. "Forgive me. I didn't know you'd end up like this." I could feel how serious and sincere he was in his apology.
I let go on my own. What he said was enough for me. Sometimes, I thought Kuya really hated me, like the rest of my cousins. He treated me differently, as if I was a mistake.
But now, hearing those words, I understood that he was also worried about me.
They placed something over my mouth and nose. I didn't have the chance to ask what it was because everything around me went dark.
I don't know how long I was unconscious, but when I woke up, I heard Kuya's voice. If I wasn't mistaken, he was talking to the doctor.
I moved slightly and felt the object on my face. It covered my mouth and nose. It seemed they attached an oxygen mask to help me breathe properly.
"This is your fault. You still think you can control me. Are you even a doctor?" the doctor said, annoyed.
"Shut up, Claudia." Kuya responded.
"She had an anxiety attack, and you just want me to sit back and shut up? Come on, Angelo, maybe you should tone down your cruelty."
"You don't understand. She needs to remember. How is she going to face her problems if she keeps running away from them?" He defended himself.
"Don't compare her to you. She'll learn in her own way."
"And when is that? When everything's too late?"
"Why are you in such a hurry?"
"Things need to be rushed. Her mom is in danger. Those people are turning her against her to move the case forward. If Jay-jay can remember, we can continue with the case against them."
Mom? What case against her?
Is that why Kuya's rushing me? For Mom?
I don't understand what's going on. I don't know about any case involving Mom, but what is it about? And who are those people Kuya's talking about?
What really happened?