Potatoes are big.
Big potatoes make people happy.
They're good steamed. Good roasted. Good fried. Delicious with salt. Even better dipped in sugar. They make you dream up all sorts of recipes, make your heart race in anticipation.
But what if the size of the potato goes beyond common sense?
That's when the story changes a little(?).
It's not the anticipation you feel, but...
'Is this insane?'
Kim Jangcheol was more shocked than excited.
And that was understandable.
He'd rushed to the scene after hearing the urgent shouts from the farming corps members. And the first thing he saw when he arrived was a potato bigger than a watermelon.
'How in the world—?'
At first, he doubted his eyes.
Then he doubted his mind.
Maybe the stress lately had gotten to him.
Well, it made sense.
He'd literally staked his life on this potato farm. Then that absurd 2nd Star Master had shown up and caused chaos. He'd almost died.
So this was...
"A potato properly grown in the field... is it supposed to be like this, Lord Credos?"
"..."
While lost in confusion, the question from Flute's dad poked at his ear. That snapped Kim Jangcheol back to his senses. He stared down at the unearthed potato with as cold a gaze as he could manage.
"......"
No matter how he looked at it, that wasn't a potato. Even by watermelon standards, it had to weigh at least 8 kilograms, maybe over 9.
So was it a mutation, or something?
"Let's dig it out."
He needed to verify.
The farming corps members bustled into action. The potato was so large it took quite a bit of time to dig it up. And when the full might(?) of the ultra-massive, super-ultra potato was revealed—
That's when it happened.
"Huh?"
Flute's dad, who was digging, made another odd sound. He turned toward Kim Jangcheol and spoke in a dazed tone.
".....There's more?"
"What?"
"I mean, there's... more...?"
"No way."
"That 'no way'... seems to be 'yes way,' if you ask me?"
"........"
He shoved the dad aside. And he saw it. Right beneath the freshly unearthed super potato—others strung along like Vienna sausages, more super potatoes!
"...."
They were the same.
Almost the same size as the first one.
No—this one was bumpier and looked even a bit larger.
"Tsk. Maybe my body's gone weak lately."
Slap! Slap slap!
Kim Jangcheol instinctively slapped his own cheeks. But the hallucination(?) didn't vanish.
So then...
'Is this really real?'
It was ridiculous.
The farming corps members seemed to feel the same way.
"Uh, Lord Credos...?"
"Yeah."
"Is this... what field-grown potatoes are usually like?"
"Nope."
"They're not?"
"Nope."
If they were, potatoes would've conquered all agriculture long ago. So this was...
"Let's keep digging. No, move aside. I'll dig."
Kim Jangcheol moved his hands himself.
Rustle! Rustle!
His hands dug through the dirt.
The overwhelming size of the super potato was revealed.
The breaths of the surrounding farming corps members grew more and more frantic.
Rustle! Rustle!
The second potato was completely unearthed. And beside it, another potato came into view. Also absurdly huge. The kind you'd think even dinosaurs could eat.
Rustle! Rustle rustle!
They kept coming.
Three, four, five, eight, sixteen, twenty. Still endlessly continuing like a train going choo-choo without end.
'This is insane'
It was now certain.
This wasn't just one or two.
No, it was possible every potato in this field was like this.
…Thump, thump!
His heart thumped wildly on its own. Excitement surged up. At the end of the despair where he thought everything had collapsed, he faced an unexpected streak of jackpot.
But Kim Jangcheol barely held back the elation that threatened to burst out. And with a cold mind, he opened his eyes wide to analyze.
'Hnnng!'
He glared at the unearthed super potato. Without blinking. For 200 seconds. Until red veins marched in tight formation across his eyes.
Then, finally, there was a response.
Ding dong!
[Bloodshot Eyes skill has been activated.]
[Your target: Super Potato]
[Predicting current condition and future development of the Super Potato.]
[This potato was originally a nutrient lump attached to the stem. It was an ordinary potato about 5cm in size. However, due to interference from 2nd Star Master Planus, it was deprived of nutrients and faced the crisis of shrinking smaller than a cherry tomato...]
"......"
So that's what happened.
But then how did it get this big? Kim Jangcheol carefully read through the next part of the message.
[However, more recently, 2nd Star Master Planus, who had been stealing nutrients from this field, met with sudden death and complete destruction. Until his final moment, 2nd Star Master Planus did not retract the roots he had cast here, and right after his death, those roots rapidly decayed and rotted underground, spewing back all the nutrients they had absorbed into the potato field.]
…Aha.
[Thanks to that, this potato was able to absorb a massive amount of nutrients in an instant, and in turn, grew immensely. This potato is very proud of that fact, and that feeling is unlikely to change.]
Got it.
So it was thanks to that 2nd Star Master bastard(?).
'This is what they call a blessing in disguise.'
It wasn't a simple mutation.
It wasn't just luck.
The destruction and plundering brought by the 2nd Star Master. And the miraculous inevitability that returned after overcoming and defeating it.
Then, there was no need to worry anymore. They could simply rejoice in this outcome together.
So then...
"Everyone, listen up."
Kim Jangcheol stood up.
All eyes—filled with mixed emotions—turned to him.
Farming corps members biting their lower lips hard. Asurat, carrying faint hopes. Hartok, obviously trying hard to stay calm.
Sirgi, half-turned away but clearly eavesdropping with perked-up ears. Baal, just staring at the super potato and gulping down saliva. Even Zephyros, listening to the declaration while being supported(?) by Tbong.
To all of them, he spoke.
"You asked if this is what field-grown potatoes are normally like. The answer is no."
"...!"
"Potatoes aren't like this. You all remember the size of the potatoes we planted, right? Normally, you reap what you sow. But... this is what we got. Incredibly huge, and just as rich in yield."
"Then... my Lord?"
Zephyros asked cautiously.
"Does this mean... it's a bumper crop?"
"That's right."
So very joyful.
So overwhelmingly elated.
"Our potato harvest... is a bumper crop!"
"...!"
No one knew who shouted in joy first.
Rising ecstasy.
Laughter and cheers.
Would this be the level of frenzy if someone scored a comeback goal with one minute left in the World Cup finals?
Who knows.
Before long, everyone had mingled into a chaotic mess, shouting meaningless things. Just hugging those beside them, cheering, and hopping in place with joy.
Kim Jangcheol watched them all for a long while, thoroughly pleased. Then quietly savored his own joy, just for himself.
" ..."
I'm alive.
We did it.
At first, it had all just felt overwhelming. I didn't even really believe something like this was possible. It had been nothing more than a desperate gamble to survive.
But I never thought it would come this far.
Never imagined we'd achieve results like this.
'Phew. So then…'
It's times like this you have to stay cool.
If you let loose, things fall apart.
So, he cleared his throat, turned to everyone, and spoke, strictly, as if drawing a line in the sand.
"Everyone, listen up. A true bumper crop is only complete when the processes of harvest and storage are finished. Even then, it's not over. We still need to consider how to distribute and process the stored crops... Guh?"
The attempt to settle everyone's excitement ended in spectacular(?) failure. Someone suddenly yanked him in.
Startled, he looked—and it was Baal.
"Baal! So happy!"
"Huh? Wha—? What are you doing?"
"Baal! Grab Lord Credos and dance, dance!"
"Hey—let go, you crazy—guh-yaaaah!"
Whoosh!
A surprise giant swing!
No, a carousel-style spin while being hugged tight!
Kim Jangcheol flailed.
But that wasn't the end of his suffering. It was just the beginning.
"My lord. I've heard that at times like these, humans perform something called a 'cheering toss.'"
"...Ugh, my neck—huh?"
"According to records of human customs left from the era when the previous Demon King invaded the human world."
Just as he'd escaped Baal and was rubbing his neck, Zephyros spoke with impeccable timing. His glasses glinted coldly. With a calm tone, he spoke smoothly.
"It's a custom where the leader who contributed most to a successful endeavor is thrown into the air. A beautiful and lively tradition perfect for a moment like this."
"...What?"
"Stand still."
"Huh? Hey? Wait, hey! Hey hey hey!"
Zephyros gave the signal with a glance.
Everyone rushed in.
They grabbed his arms and legs. He struggled, but it was no use. In an instant, he was hoisted up. It was bewildering and absurd. He couldn't help but let out a laugh of disbelief.
'Are they really... doing a cheering toss? To me?'
A cheering toss.
He'd never experienced one in his life.
And for it to happen here, in the heart of abandoned land teeming with the demon race. And the ones tossing him were the elite Four Heavenly Kings and demons.
'...Hah.'
This isn't so bad.
Suddenly, he thought he was happy.
He recalled all the moments they had suffered together.
Something swelled in his chest. A strange, tender feeling that made his nose sting, that kept making him smile, without even realizing it.
"One! Two! Throw!"
Fwump—!
"...!"
Have you ever been thrown in a cheering toss so high that you reached the 828-meter summit of the Burj Khalifa? If someone were to ask that someday, he now had the right(?) to say, "Yes."
"Ha. Seriously."
Laughter kept spilling out.
That foolish, unguarded kind of laughter that slips out when you're this high up, where no one can see your face, so you just let it all go.
Whoosh!
The peak of joyous ascent.
Followed by the exhilarating fall.
Kim Jangcheol couldn't stop laughing as he looked down below.
And he saw it—those who had tossed him scattering, as if their job was done.
"That's it for the cheering toss!"
"Baal! Wants to catch falling Lord Credos!"
"No, you may not."
"Why not, Zephyros! I don't understand!"
"In the human custom records left by the previous Demon King, it only says, 'They joyfully toss the one who achieved great merit into the air.' There's no mention of catching them afterward."
"R-Really?!"
"Indeed. Which means, the cheering toss ends with the 'tossing' part alone."
"Baal! Understands!"
…Don't understand that! Don't believe that completely wrong analysis! Don't scatter! Come back! Hey! Just wait a second!
Kim Jangcheol flailed as he rapidly descended—no, fell.
But it was no use.
Everyone nodded firmly, trusting Zephyros's incorrect analysis. Then they each stepped back five paces—to help with his descent(?).
And thanks to that, all he saw below was empty ground.
Ground that would oh-so-perfectly catch his fall.
"...You bastaaards—!"
Moments later, Kim Jangcheol's screams were buried by a loud thud.
It was summer—no, the season of harvest.
***
The vibrant potato harvest had begun.
Of course, Kim Jangcheol maintained firm command over the farming corps until the harvest was fully completed.
"Everyone! Remember the safety measures for potato harvesting!"
"Yes, sir!"
Hartok shouted back.
"One! Be careful not to damage the surface of the potatoes during digging. Two! Once harvested, leave the potatoes to dry for a few hours in the shade before storing them in a dark place! This prevents exposure to sunlight, which turns them green and causes them to synthesize toxic alkaloid glycosides like solanine!"
"...Ooh, as expected of the Chief Captain of the farming corps!"
Everyone was impressed by Hartok's knowledge.
Having received secret pre-education(?) from the Demon King, Hartok's nose was high and his happiness index secretly hit an all-time high.
Thanks to that, the potato harvest proceeded splendidly!
A smile bloomed on Asurat's face. Sirgi grumbled about getting dirt on her hands but never stopped digging up potatoes.
Baal was caught trying to secretly munch on raw potatoes and was made to stand with raised hands in a corner of the field. The 3rd Star Master chuckled at the sight and continued harvesting with gusto.
So, Kim Jangcheol asked:
"Hey? Excuse me? Mr. Lobster?"
"...."
"3rd Star Master? Knock knock?"
"......"
"Why are you harvesting potatoes here?"
"......"
"Weren't you supposed to be a lightning rod? Hm?"
"...."
After the stake that had anchored him was destroyed during the 2nd Star Master's rampage, the 3rd Star Master had quietly blended into the farming corps, trying to shed his lightning rod role—only to be caught red-handed by Kim Jangcheol.
Asurat, realizing what was happening, dashed in like the wind.
"How dare you! Abandon the sacred duty of the lightning rod without permission! Lord Credos! This one must be thoroughly punished!"
"...Says our part-time lightning rod, employee number one."
"That's right! How dare you! A stake-job like you, trying to stand alongside a sky-high part-timer and harvest potatoes together! Hmph!"
"...As he says."
"This is clearly a case of deserting one's post!"
"...If that's how it is, then I've got no choice either."
Kim Jangcheol flashed a bright smile.
Asurat huffed proudly in satisfaction.
A shadow of doom fell over the 3rd Star Master's face.
Meanwhile, the super potatoes kept filling the storage day by day. It was more than enough to make up for the losses caused by the 2nd Star Master's rampage.
Thanks to that, just as everyone's faces began to glow with smiles more benevolent than even Buddha's, a messenger from the 4th Star Master arrived at the temporary Demon King's castle after a long journey.
He brought news that, upon hearing of Kim Jangcheol's declaration of farming, the 4th Star Master—burning with loyalty and a sense of duty—had single handedly raised the flag of invasion toward the human world.
[T/L: Please support me and read extra chapters: https://ko-fi.com/revengerscans ]